It’s the end of the year. I like to take this time to reflect on the year I had and the events that occurred throughout to get me to where I am. I always say that these posts are primarily for me to read and look back on, but it’s also nice to share moments and memories with others.
So here we go, this is my reflection of 2021!

January 2021

We brought in the New Year’s in Atlanta with my husband’s family due to his mom being sick. Which was very bittersweet, but I’m glad they were all able to get together. We started the process of buying a house the month before, so this month we continued looking for houses in the range we were approved for, and it was exciting and a little overwhelming. I had applied for a team lead position at the end of December, and this month I had two interviews and ended up getting promoted. My start date was set for February.

February 2021

This month was our first wedding anniversary and, of course, my birthday. We celebrated by staying the weekend at the JW Marriott Resort, and it was my turn to plan this celebration, so I ended up booking us a private room for dinner, the first time experiencing dinner like that for the both of us. 🙂

We also ate a little of our wedding cake. For you married folks, did you save the top layer of your wedding cake by freezing it to eat on your first anniversary? We didn’t plan this, it kind of just happened. Supposedly, it’s done for good luck. Hmmm….maybe I can write a blog post about this. LOL

This was the piece of cake that was saved.

Right after our wedding anniversary weekend, my husband flew out to Michigan to be with his mom because her health was declining. He flew with a one-day ticket, neither one of us knowing when he would be coming back. While he was there, I started my new team lead position, which took some adjustments here and there, and I continued to look at houses. You can read all about our process of buying a house here.

March 2021

March was a rough month! I flew up to Michigan to say my last goodbye to my mother-in-law. I only went for the weekend, although I debated staying longer. I flew back down on Sunday afternoon, and by Sunday evening, March 7th, she passed. Back on the plane, I was Monday morning to be with my husband. I took the rest of the week off, and that was such a heavy, heavy week.

On Wednesday, the 10th, was seven months since my grandfather had passed, and the very next day, March 11th, was the 5th death anniversary of my mom. I spent most of that week in bed; to be completely honest, my chest was too heavy to do anything. Let’s just say the month of March would never be the same for my husband and me. We attended the funeral on Friday, and I believe I flew back home the next day. Around March 19th, I heard that my great-grandmother had passed in NYC. I was so over the grieving. 🙁

Towards the end of the month, we went to the Dominican Republic to have another funeral service and burial for her. That’s where she wanted to rest. And as soon as we got back from DR, it was moving time.

April 2021

We got all moved into our new house! I was super excited, and I honestly couldn’t believe we had a WHOLE house, LOL, but it was also overwhelming. You quickly realize how many “little” things need to be done or bought for a house. I’m grateful that my husband’s siblings came down to help us move and get settled; that was such a blessing. Although we had no furniture yet, we celebrated Easter at our house; it was nice to see everyone gather in OUR HOUSE!!

No furniture yet but a house full of love. 🙂

I attended the Liveway Women Live Conference for the third year in a row. This year, our church hosted it, so we gathered at our church and watched it together online. I wrote about this years’ experience; you can read it here.

This month was also when I found out I was pregnant. We had been trying since my first loss, and I knew I was pregnant the week before I took the test; I felt that God had told me. I took two pregnancy tests, and they were both positive, but because of my loss, I was still very nervous. It was a bittersweet moment when I told my husband because I kept thinking about my mother-in-law and how excited she was when we told her about the first baby and how she had just passed away the month before. But my husband reminded me that everything happens in God’s timing. By week six of my pregnancy, I started feeling all the pregnancy symptoms.

May 2021

The pregnancy symptoms continued, so I wasn’t very active with anything this month. I was sick all the time, so after work, I would nap. I was constantly fatigued, so the struggle to do ANYTHING was real. I wrote about my struggle, and you can read it here. I hosted two guest writers on my blog, which was really exciting for me.

June 2021

We had our first ultrasound this month! The most beautiful sound in the world is hearing your baby’s heartbeat for the first time. 🙂 Since we knew everything was going well with our bean, we shared the news with our families. Everyone was as excited as when we first shared the news in November. This month my daughter left for summer vacation to the Dominican Republic to spend time with her dad and family. I missed her so much, but she had an absolute blast!

July 2021

We spent Independence Day in Michigan, but we ended up having one of the worst flying experiences ever before we got there. Let me summarize it quickly; our flight was supposed to leave at 9:30 pm and arrive around 11 pm – we didn’t arrive in Michigan until 5 am. Maybe I’ll write a blog post about that story soon. We spent a week in Michigan and drove down to Chicago one day for some delicious deep-dish pizza and to walk around Millennium Park. I always enjoy my time visiting home. My daughter arrived from the Dominican Republic at the end of this month. 🙂

August 2021

August is one of my favorite months of the year because it’s my husband’s birthday. This year I booked a trip for us to fly to New York. We went to Liberty Island, Ellis Island, and we went to a Yankee’s baseball game (this was on our bucket list, to attend a game at the Yankee Stadium). The trip was eventful, and we ate delicious food; you can never go wrong with New York City pizza. We stayed at the RIU Hotel in the middle of Times Square, which was a great location to get to where we wanted to go, except for the Yankees Stadium, which is in the Bronx. I have a video on my YouTube channel about this trip; you can watch it here. On my husband’s actual birthday, I invited his closest friends to hang out at the house, and that was a blast too!

My daughter started second grade this month! She was SO excited to be back to school in person after a year of virtual school. I was nervous because there were still a lot of cases of COVID, especially in kids, around this time. I was also nervous because it was a new school for her since we moved to a different city. But she loves school, has lots of friends, and adores her teacher!

September 2021

My aunt planned a 70s themed surprise birthday party for my grandma, and we hosted it at my house. 🙂 My grandma was truly surprised, and she started crying. Unfortunately, our whole family couldn’t be there due to some family member catching COVID, but we made it work the best we could.

This month I had to take the famous and fabulous glucose tolerance test. I shared my experience on my YouTube channel. I ended up failing both tests, the one hour one and the three hours one and got diagnosed with gestational diabetes.

Speaking about sharing experiences, this is also the month my vlog was born, Into My Life Vlog! Feel free to subscribe; I share videos every Thursday at 5 pm EST. 🙂

October 2021

This month I got to see Lauren Daigle in concert!!! I shared this experience on my channel as well. I was looking forward to this concert, especially since we had waited over a year because it kept getting postponed due to COVID. Christian concerts are so unique and powerful; if you have the chance to attend one, do it.

We attended fall festivals, did family activities, and our usual fall routines.

This month I had my first appointment with the high-risk pregnancy doctor to discuss my gestational diabetes and everything that came with it. I was a little overwhelmed with all the new information and the new routine I had to do, like checking my blood sugar four times a day, creating an eating log, counting carbs, etc. After the first week of checking my sugar, my fasting blood tests in the morning were high, so the doctor put me on insulin. So, there was that. Towards the end of the month, I had an ultrasound to check everything, the heart, lungs, head, kidneys, and see how big he was getting. Everything was in the normal range. Thanks God!!

November 2021

Here starts the busyness of the end of the year! Mine and my husband’s dating anniversary is this month, and it was my turn to plan something. I hired a chef to cook for us at our place, and man, was it delicious! Hubby surprised me with flowers, even though I told him not to buy me anything. It was a romantic evening.

We attended the Orlando Heart Walk for the first time as a family. We did the one-mile walk instead of the three, but it was still a fun experience.

We had our baby shower this month. This was also a wonderful experience; I have a video on my channel about it. We got so many lovely presents for our baby, and we truly felt all the love that day. That is one day I do not mind reliving again, if I could.

We hosted Thanksgiving at our home this year!! I was actually excited to host, and I loved having all my family together at our house. I just kept looking around at everyone having a good time, and it felt so amazing. I never knew I would enjoy being a homeowner and sharing my house with others. 🙂

For my daughter’s birthday, we took her to Legoland Florida Resort. That was a fun day for her and a tiring day for this pregnant mama. LOL By 3 pm, I couldn’t walk anymore because my back was hurting so much. 🙁

December 2021

Alright, here we are, December! The last month of the year. This month we have been getting ready for our baby’s arrival. We washed all his clothes, set up the bassinet, and put his car seat and stroller together. My daughter had a winter concert that we attended, and we’ve been getting ready for Christmas. It’s been a month of getting ready.

This year has been eventful; it’s has had its emotional rollercoaster, but I feel beyond blessed to be able to live another year. Now, I’m looking forward to meeting my son and seeing what 2022 has in store for us.

I’ve written my goals down for next year, personal, writing, and career goals. And I’m looking forward to growth!

If you’ve read until the end, I appreciate it more than you will ever know because, honestly, I feel like these recap/reflection posts are primarily for myself.

I want to wish you all a very MERRY CHRISTMAS and a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

With Love,

Heidy

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The holidays are a joyous time of the year! We have Thanksgiving, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, just to name a few, but sometimes it’s not such a joyous time for those who are grieving a loved one.

This time of year can be challenging for those who just lost a loved one; maybe they lost their loved ones around the holiday season, or their loved ones birthday is around this time and while grieving, this time of year can be tough because they are missing their person more than usual.

I lost my grandfather last year in August, but this time of year is hard because his birthday was in late November, and every time I hear the song “little drummer boy,” I think of him because it was his favorite English Christmas song. Little things like that remind me that he’s no longer here, and it can get me sad.

With this post, I want to give five tips you can use to help cope with grief around the holiday season.

1. Set Healthy Boundaries

This time of year is usually busier than other times because of all the festivities that come with the holidays. For example, there are Christmas showcases, plays, or concerts at kids’ schools; you have Christmas parties from church, Christmas/Holiday parties from work, or even some of your friends might throw a holiday party, like an ugly Christmas sweater party. But all these festivities can feel overwhelming if you’re going through grief, and you may not feel up to attending all of them. That’s okay! Do not be afraid to say no to attending some of them. Also, do not let anyone pressure you into doing anything you don’t want to do.

Photo by Karolina Grabowska on Pexels.com

2. Plan Ahead

Knowing that this time of year is so busy and that your loved one will not be with you, you can plan ahead to help with the grieving process. One way to do this is by driving yourself to the function; this way, you’ll be able to leave when you want or if you start to feel overwhelmed. Often, the anticipation of how bad an event will be is worse than the actual event, so to help, make a plan of how you’ll get through it. You can do this weeks before the event or a few days ahead.

3. Create New Traditions

Many things done for the holidays are based on traditions, and to help cope with grief during this time, you can start a new tradition with your family. For example, maybe your loved one was the one who always placed the tree topper, but this year you can honor a new family member with the responsibility. Get creative this year and do something new, or you can also change some traditions to make them fit better with this new stage of your life.

4. Do Something Kind for Others

Nothing makes you feel better than giving back to others and the best time to do it is during the holidays. There are many places in your community where you can volunteer. For example, you can volunteer at a food bank, Salvation Army, or usually, your local church has activities where you can volunteer. You could also donate toys for kids in need, like for Toys for Tots or Operation Christmas Child. Many people don’t have homes or family members with whom they can spend the holidays, and giving back to the less fortunate is truly an amazing gesture.

Photo by RODNAE Productions on Pexels.com

5. Be Patient with Yourself

The best thing you can do for yourself this holiday season is, be patient with yourself. Grief comes in waves, and sometimes you are okay, and then two seconds later, something reminds you of your loved one, and you’re in tears. Let the emotions come, and don’t try to suppress them because experiencing the pain will help you in the long run. Understand that there is no time limit for grieving. A bonus tip I would give is to journal. Write down your feelings when they come, or write down good memories you have with your loved one to honor their memory. There is no right or wrong way to grief, as long as you are coping with it healthily.

I hope these tips will help you or someone you know who is grieving a loved one. Please feel free to share with them. Let me know in the comments additional ways you know that can help someone cope with grief during the holiday season.

I want to leave you with a Bible verse that helped me during my grieving season, “The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit,” Psalms 34:18 NIV.