Children are like sponges; they absorb their environment. If their environment is negative, they will be negative and vice versa. Children mimic what they see and especially what they hear. I read online, I cannot remember where right this moment, for parents to listen to their children when they play pretend, so parents can know how their children feel. Because children absorb so much, it is important to tell them encouraging words.
By telling your kids encouraging words, you will build up their confidence, and by building up their confidence, you will raise confident adults. You know the saying, “if you think you can, you’re right, and if you think you can’t, you’re also right?” The same applies to kids. As a parent, if you are telling your children that they cannot do something or consistently telling them negative words, they will never have the confidence to do anything and not think of themselves as worthy. And the consequence of the negative words is that it affects their self-esteem.
For example, I didn’t grow up hearing too many encouraging words. I heard that I could never do anything right, or I wasn’t using my head to think. As a result of hearing that, I got to the point that I didn’t think I was worthy. It was like, what’s the point of me trying to do anything if I can never do anything right? So, my self-esteem was nowhere to be found, and I needed validation from others consistently. I also copied and wanted to be like my peers to try and find worth in myself.
These emotions usually lead to people putting themselves into dangerous situations trying to fit in. Luckily for me, that wasn’t my case. I mean, I wasn’t the most innocent teenager, but I didn’t put myself in harm’s way. But because of the negative words I heard all the time growing up, I do the opposite with my daughter.
I try to always tell my daughter positive words. For example, I tell her she’s beautiful, smart, and can do anything. And I remind her that I love her. As a result, she will randomly tell me I’m beautiful and that she loves me. Why? Because she’s mimicking what I say to her. I want to build her confidence because it starts at home. I want to make sure she is confident in herself to do anything she sets her mind to. I also want her to be sure of herself so she doesn’t have to find validation in others.
We should say things like this to our children:
“You are smart”
“You can do anything”
“You are beautiful”
“I love you”
“You are strong”
“It’s okay to make mistakes”
“If you couldn’t do it this time, try again”
“Don’t give up”
One of my favorite verses is Psalm 139:14 NIV, “I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.” This is a great verse to share with your kids as it serves as a reminder that God made them perfectly.
What are some other positive affirmations you can share with your kids?
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